


Did it work?

by Iyrs



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: bc that sand quote is gold and I'm trash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-06
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-18 15:29:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5933419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iyrs/pseuds/Iyrs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux can't believe Kylo Ren is real and so stupid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The sand

_I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth."_  

 

 

"I don't like sand..." Kylo Ren says but Hux doesn't really cares so he turns a deaf ear to the knight and continues to watch his men working on the bridge.  

 

Everything is going smoothly and they will be able to reach Snoke's location on time. 

 

"Are you listening?" Ren asks and Hux wants to tell him that no, he didn't listen to any of his stupid words but he's also not in the mood to have a fight with him right now. 

 

"I was thinking." Hux replies and hopes that the knight of Ren will shut up. 

 

"I don't like sand." He says again and Hux can't ask himself enough times what he did wrong to deserve this. "It's coarse and rough..." 

 

"And I guess that's why you couldn't bother to get on Jakku and capture that droid?" 

 

Ren stops and Hux can feel his eyes piercing holes through his skull but it's not his fault if this pathetic knight felt offended, after all he started this conversation. 

 

"...and irritating and it gets everywhere."  

 

Hux would kill Snoke for this, he sometimes consider it until he falls asleep but he can't get bothered enough to _really_ try it but he has a feeling that he's not far away from the final push. 

 

"Do you think I care?" He asks Ren who just stands there next to him. 

 

"Not like here. Here everything is soft." The knight extends his arm and Hux can feel the leather of Ren's gloves touching his own gloves and it makes his skin crawl under them. 

 

He wants to punch that idiot in the face. Of course remove that stupid helmet first and punch him in the face after that, maybe twice, add a kick or two and it would be perfect. But he's on the bridge of the ship and the room is full with people and he wonders if he can leave and lock himself in his room for the next hour until he forgets that Kylo Ren exists. But he's a proud man and he can't step so low in front of the knight. 

 

"And smooth."  

 

By now Ren is so close that Hux can see himself in that hideous helmet and he knows Ren can feel the anger rolling in waves from him. 

 

"Are you done Ren?" 

 

The knight moves his right hand slowly to touch Hux's shoulder and he wants to scream. 

 

"Did it work?" Ren whispers and comes closer and Hux really thinks about kicking him in the balls. 

 

"What Ren? Are you trying to do something with that Force of yours or are you just plain stupid?"  

 

"Did I seduce you?"  

 

Hux blinks and finds himself at a loss of words. 

 

"Excuse me?" 

 

"That how my grandfather seduced my grandmother." Ren explains like it's nothing too important. 

 

"Kylo," Hux says and he can feel something similar to hope rising in the knight. "Your family is fucking stupid." 

 

And then he turns on his heels and leaves as fast as possible because he's no fool and he can feel Kylo Ren watching him go and most probably trying his hardest not to crush his skull with only a wave of his hand. 

 

"I can't believe him I can't fucking believe him." He mutters to himself as he makes his way to his chambers. "The First Order deserves better, _I_ deserve better."  

 

He can't wait to dump Kylo Ren on a planet far away from here and let Snoke have his ways with the boy because how is that guy even real?  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what this is but I had to write it!  
> I didn't even try okay I just contributed to this fandom and my work here is done  
> I bet someone did this before because why not this idea is gold


	2. The pear

Hux is usually eating in his chambers for a lot of reasons like not having the curious eyes of the stormtroopers watching his every move, not having to put up with all the noise, being able to drink a glass or two of liqueur and most importantly, not seeing Kylo Ren's face, more like helmet but that's the same thing anyway. 

 

So Hux is quite enjoying himself until the door to his room opens out of the blue and his hand flies towards his blaster which was resting on top of the table and he almost shoots the person who enters but stops his hand right before doing it, and regrets it five seconds afterwards when Kylo Ren steps in the room with a plate in his hand. 

 

Both men stare at each other and he knows that Ren is looking at the blaster which is still pointed at his chest and decides to come closer. After that stupid discussion on the bridge a few days ago Hux didn't see Ren at least once and he was afraid, in a good way, that he left the ship. Sadly, he's not that lucky. 

 

"What do you want Ren?" He asks and puts the blaster down right when Ren sits down on a chair right in front of Hux. 

 

"To have diner," Ren responds and puts the plate on the table and on top of it he adds a pear.  

 

A fucking pear. 

 

"I don't want to have dinner with you, get out!" Hux almost screams but Ren doesn't pay attention to him and steals his fork and knife right from his plate and cuts that pear in half. 

 

"Here," he says and a part of the pear starts levitating in the air and Hux can't count fast enough to 10 in order to calm himself.  

 

"To put it gently, what the fuck are you doing?" Hux asks when the pear reaches his mouth and he leans backwards trying to avoid it but it keeps coming closer and closer. 

 

"I'm feeding you." Ren tell him and Hux would do anything to have that helmet out of the way and see that bastard's face. 

 

"I don't want you to feed me get out!" 

 

But Ren doesn't get out and doesn't stop playing with that Force of his and Hux can feel the pear pressing on his lips and he reaches for the blaster again only that the little fucker moves it with the Force too. 

 

"Come on General, I came here with dinner and cut it for you and now I'm trying to feed it to you, why can't you accept me being nice once in a while?" 

 

Damn him and damn the whole galaxy. 

 

He gives up eventually and opens his mouth and bits that piece of pear so hard that he feels his teeth clicking together. 

 

"One in a while? This is the first time what possessed you?" He barks at Ren who leans in his chair and even with that helmet covering his face he looks too smug for his own good. 

 

"I heard this is a good way of...bonding together." 

 

Bonding together. _Bonding together!_  

 

"Are you telling me that you're still trying to follow your grandfather's horrible, I might say, pickup ways?" 

 

Ren shrugs and Hux literally launches himself across the table to get a grip on that bastard but Ren is faster and he sits up before Hux is able to even come close to him. 

 

"They will work eventually, you just wait, General." The knight says and leaves the room. 

 

Hux can't believe this. He didn't sign up for this. 

 

"Why couldn't he get obsessed with his grandmother or someone else?" He screams at nobody and decides that finishing that bottle of liqueur is a good idea. He's dedicated to the First Order, body and soul, but by the end of the night he finds the idea of writing a letter of resignation very appealing. 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...yeah  
> I can't help it okay?? I had to   
> I love this ship it has so much potential from jokes like this fic to pure angst it's beautiful  
> Also yeah Hux would drink liqueur, strawberry flavored :')


	3. They know

By now Hux was convinced that Kylo Ren is on a mission to piss him off that bad that he will go on and destroy his own ship and let's be honest, he can take lessons about that from Kylo fuckign Ren who this time is following him in the hallways of the _Finalizer_ like some sort of a lost puppy. 

 

"Do you need something, Ren?" Hux asks after he takes a turn and sees that the long corridor is empty. 

 

"Yes." Comes the answer, very close to his ear. 

 

"Humor me." 

 

But Ren says nothing and they reach the end of the hallway and Hux wants to go in his room and maybe take a shower because damn the past few days left him somehow pretty tired and sore. 

 

"I guess we have to part." Hux doesn't stick around for a response but he still hears Ren scream after him. 

 

"Say you love me!" 

 

Hux closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and turns on his heels to face the person who gives him constant headaches. 

 

"I hate you Ren." 

 

He can tell that the knight is frowning under that helmet and he wants to smile a little. In time you get to know how to piss Kylo Ren off and how he reacts to that even if you can't see his face. 

 

"No General, 'I love you', not 'I hate you'. But it's okay, you can try again." 

 

Hux can't believe this, but oh he can. Everything is possible with Ren on this ship and Hux can't wait to get rid of him. 

 

"I hate you." He says again and Ren's fingers are twitching. 

 

"General, do you have hearing problems? I can try to solve them." 

 

Ren steps closer and Hux, against his pride, steps back.  

 

"Don't you dare come close to my ears!" Hux shouts and he hears a sound behind him, like boots scratching the floor and he turns so fast that he almost loses his balance but all he can see is a flash of chrome. 

 

 _That better not be_ _Phasma_ _._  

 

"Say you love me." 

 

Hux swears he almost has a heart attack when Ren whispers in his ear and sadly, he's not fast enough to get away from the knight before he gets him in his arms and Ren is so close that Hux can feel every single curve and rise of these black robes. He's angry because Ren is gripping his arms too tightly and his own clothes start to crumple.  

 

"If you don't let me go I'm telling Snoke that you are molesting me."  

 

Ren is probably smiling. Damn that fucking ugly helmet. 

 

"Say you love me and I'm letting you go." 

 

Hux smirks and gets his face as close as possible to that hideous helmet and he's sure that if he tries hard enough he can see Ren's eyes though it. 

 

"Never." He whispers and they stay like that for almost one minute and he really hopes that no stormtrooper had seen them. 

 

Eventually Ren lets him go and Hux is sure that he's just imagining things but the knight looks maybe a little disappointed as he makes his way down the hallway. 

 

Hux doesn't care, but he still thinks maybe two seconds too much about it. 

 

Anyway, the next morning when he opens the door to get out of his rooms he's meet with Kylo Ren, again. 

 

More precisely with Kylo Ren's eyes. 

 

 _Fuck him._  

 

"What now?" He asks and Ren gives him a smirk. 

 

 _Cocky bastard._  

 

"Say you love me." 

 

"Ren I swear I'll punch you if you don't drop that nonsense." 

 

"Just say it General, and I'll stop. I promise." 

 

That sounds too good to be true and Hux can't believe it. 

 

"Your promises mean nothing to me." 

 

"But you can try and hope for the best, can't you?" 

 

Hux takes a deep breath, counts to 10, and then to 20, add 10 more and than he looks Ren right in the eyes, big brown and stupid eyes, and says it. 

 

"I love you." 

 

Ren smiles this time, or smirks, Hux is not sure because he's starting to boil with hate. 

 

"I know." 

 

Hux blinks, once, twice, and keeps blinking and he almost forgets to breathe. 

 

"That's it? You know?" He yells and throws his arms up. "Don't tell me this is your grandfather's biggest pickup line ever." 

 

Ren's smile fells and for a second he looks sad, maybe? Hux is too angry with him to be sure. 

 

"It's not my grandfather's." 

 

Well, if it's not dear grandpa Vader, than who in the whole Galaxy would say something like that?  

 

"Don't tell me it was Solo's." 

 

Ren shrugs but smiles at him again and Hux is so lost. So totally lost. 

 

"Did it work?" Ren asks him and Hux almost punches him in the face.  

 

But he thinks better about it and manages to get past the knight and hurry down the hallway. 

 

"Hux, where are you going?"  

 

He turns his head but keeps walking and give Kylo Ren his most hateful stare. 

 

"I'm going to turn myself to the Resistance and have some words with your mother!" 

 

He doesn't get too far before Ren takes him in his arms and well isn't he lucky that the hallway is empty? Maybe too empty? 

 

"I love you." Ren says and Hux is crying. Tears of frustation. 

 

He's literally crying because this is ridiculous and this guy is aging him ten years in one day and he hates him, he hates him so much that he really wanted to get on a ship and meet with General Organa and scream at her that her son turned out so wrong. 

 

"I fucking know." He whispers and he can feel Ren laugh. 

 

Hux is going to poison his food tonight. He's really doing it this time. 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea okay...  
> I mean poor Hux he has to put up with Ren and his shit, Snoke better pay him well.  
> I'm done, really done with them, switching back to reading not writing kylux.  
> But I wonder for how long.


End file.
